kittensinboxes | Hang My Head, Drown My Fear [Lab of Nature AU, Suffering Is Magic]

Hang My Head, Drown My Fear [Lab of Nature AU, Suffering Is Magic]

Kaiba remembers pain. He remembers...drowning.

And he remembers smiling as he maliciously made it all worse and watched the life spill from his throat, spewing out with arterial force before him and creating a mess of wasted life all around him.

Then, he remembers--more pain? How could there be more pain after death? He knows he's screaming, but nothing comes out. He struggles against his bonds, but he's too weak, too weak, and even opening his eyes shows little besides the searing white lights of an operating room, the flash of a face that resembles an ape...and then, nothing. He feels something cover his mouth, inhales reflexively...then passes out. It's a release, freeing him from the delirium of the restoration and the pain of the experimentation that occurs in between.

He won't remember it. Perhaps that's a mercy.

---

When Kaiba finally does wake, it's in a new room, with aching limbs, a soured stomach, and a throat that feels poorly patched up.

He's too weak to sit up, but his tired eyes scan his surroundings, seeking out any familiarity at all. He has to do it slowly, so that the tracking of his own eyes doesn't nauseate him more than he already is.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That... that snapped Yuugi out of his own trance.

For a moment, it was like Kaiba punched him. But why? Why would it be like that? Why did his gut twist and his chest ache? It was time for him to take a single step back.

"I--"

He said he was a person.

He saw him as a man.

For all of this man's stubborn pride, he saw Yuugi as a human being that deserved basic dignity and that was-- not what he expected in this place.

"... That's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in a long time."

...What?

Kaiba isn't the kind of guy you would expect to wear a legitimately "owlish" expression on his face, but...what?! He stands there, holding what's probably a poisoned cupcake, and just stares at Yuugi like he's grown a second head.

None of what he said there was nice at all! He just as good as told Yuugi he was insane for wanting Kaiba to cannibalize him! Why was he being weird like this?!

I wasn't trying to be nice. I was trying to tell you that I won't hurt you out of hunger! What kind of a response is that?

Yuugi smiled, though it was a sad one.

"You called me 'a man'. This place has a way of making you forget that you're a person sometimes.

I've been eaten before. I'm... not a fan of the feeling, honestly."

Kaiba...really does not know how to react to any of this. He's confused. He's...he's not supposed to feel sympathetic towards Yuugi! Hell, he's hardly felt sympathy towards anyone in so long, that he's not sure if he's experiencing a normal human emotion or heartburn.

But there is one thing it convinces him of, and perhaps it's not what Yuugi wants.

Ever since we've been in this room, all you've told me is how much you have suffered, and how much you have helped others. And you've tried to help me, for some idiotic reason, despite not even having the decency to remember who I am.

He shakes his head, looking away from the other.

I'm not going to disrespect my rival by considering him subhuman. Even if you don't remember me, my scars of defeat are something that I carry each and every day. You were the first to defeat me in my prime.

His thumb skates up the edge of the cupcake paper, then delves into the frosting.

I'm not going to be the one that cuts into you. And I refuse to accrue further debt, until mine is satisfied. Nothing you say will change that reality.

Do you understand, Yuugi?

Wait.

He's refusing to eat him. He's refusing to eat him and he's going to eat the damned cupcake instead. Out of... what? Debt?

Was that what he said?

He was speaking so fast, so intense...

For a moment, Yuugi's eyes squinted, as though he was trying to parse what he was saying...

It doesn't matter, in the end, what Yuugi's response would have been. Because Kaiba's response is to peel the paper back, glare at the shitty little baked good in his hand, and take a bite out of it.

He's committed. He's not sorry. He's going to eat it, so that Yuugi doesn't try and do it himself.

He'll accept the consequences. Surely the scientists wouldn't try to kill him, right? Death is not the best vehicle for attaining Light. There are better ways to extract suffering.

Such as a slow-acting, non-lethal poison.

...Right?

Holy shit, the crazy son of a bitch actually ate it.

Was he nuts?! What was he hoping to get out of this?! What if it...

What if it killed him?

Yuugi offered alternatives, and yet nothing worked! He still...!

"K...aiba... you just..."

It takes a minute, and he's definitely pulling faces over this thing, but...eventually Kaiba eats the whole cupcake.

Because he is not letting Yuugi eat it and he means that with his whole fucking chest.

Once he's done though, he crosses his arms and stares Yuugi down.

You've had enough.

Besides: he'd already said he was going to eat it before Yuugi took his head off for his callous behavior. Nothing changed, other than Yuugi convincing him more strongly of what he would be doing here.

Besides which, you can't go anywhere. Whatever happens, you'll be party to it. I'd say I'm sorry, but I have a feeling you'd have eaten it if I didn't, out of some kind of idea of "protecting" me or something.

Ridiculous.

Yuugi crosses his arms and stares right back. He can be just as stubborn as you, sir.

"It's not ridiculous," he insists. "To want to help you... that's not ridiculous at all."

But he was right. No matter what happened, he'd be right there. Yuugi would have to hear and see it all.

And...

He would have eaten this if Kaiba had not.

I could give you at least a handful of reasons as to why it is.

But...he doesn't feel like it. Instead, Kaiba turns on his heel and moves to his bed, sitting with arms crossed and glancing at Yuugi thoughtfully.

Play a game with me.

"Even if you did, you don't scare me."

He's seen bigger and badder guys than you, Seto Kaiba. But..

It was those next words that pricked his ears and got his attention. Game? He wanted to play a game?

Really?

Yuugi's eyes sparkled.

"Yes! I'd love to! What do you want to play?"

Because what else could they do in this place? And playing a game with him could help him keep an eye on his condition...

No. I don't imagine I do scare you. That in and of itself is also ridiculous.

As for the game...

Twenty Questions. Or Two Truths and A Lie. Pick.

It was as close to an olive branch as Kaiba would offer. Yuugi knew nothing of him, and this was an opportunity for him to find out more. Probably the only opportunity Kaiba would give him so freely.

He wanted a distraction too, after all. At least until they determined what trouble Kaiba had gotten them into. Which he does not regret, by the way.

"Hmmm...Two Truths and a lie. I like that one."

Twenty questions was just that: asking questions. It was a fun game on its face, but sometimes you needed a little more creativity. A little more panache.

That's why Two Truths and a Lie was so much fun. You could learn so much about a person just based on what kind of lies they told, or what they themselves thought was ridiculous about another person.

"Do you want me to go first?"

Yes. You may as well. Come on.

And as he says that, he turns to walk to the nearest bed, taking a seat and glancing at Yuugi expectantly. For a moment, he almost feels...normal. Like a regular person agreeing to a game with a schoolmate who he definitely hadn't tried to murder.

And Yuugi felt normal, too.

Like a normal kid who hadn't been filleted alive more times than he could count, or who hadn't killed his father figure in a mercy killing.

Or been eaten.

"Okay, um...All right."

Come on, stop sounding so giddy! Even as Yuugi sat down next to Kaiba, he couldn't keep the light out of his eyes or the smile off his face.

"I think my Grampa has the best taste in games. I hate leeks. I sent dirty messages to a handsome man over the public network."

...The third one.

It must be the third one, right? Kaiba can think of no reason as to why Yuugi would send dirty messages to a man on the network, much less consider them handsome? Then again...maybe Kaiba was the one who needed to learn more about Yuugi, if that ended up being the wrong guess.

...Seriously though?

Yuugi chuckled.

"Nope. That's not the lie."

Of course he'd think that was the lie; he'd already called him naive, right? Was the version of him that he knew...had he talked to boys before? Or girls? Did he peek at the muscles of attractive men in the locker room like Yuugi did? Did he think about pretty athletic girls in skintight spandex like Yuugi did?

What was the version he knew...like?

That was an interesting thing to think about.

"It was the first one. I love my grampa, but he's a bit old fashioned, you know? He doesn't get the newer stuff. I saved up all my money and worked in the shop to get a PC-98 and when he found out that was what I was saving up for, he got so frustrated! But when a new game comes out, I just gotta get my hands on it and play!"

It...wasn't the third one. Kaiba hides well how taken aback he is by that, but he is taken aback, at least at first. Then he realizes...why be surprised? He doesn't study his peers at school like that. Most days, he has his nose in a book to shut himself off from anyone. The only time he'd been sociable with anyone was when it suited his purposes.

Each smile on his face was a falsity created out of necessity.

He didn't need to go to school. He didn't need to do any of that.

Of course. The old man's shop is out of date, he concedes. Sugoroku's shop was as old-fashioned as he was, but to think that Yuugi would have done something like that, go behind his back for something so modern? Well...it isn't that Kaiba disagrees. It's just odd, thinking of Yuugi doing anything but going along with the status quo in his life.

But they're playing a game, aren't they? He hasn't forgotten.

I can read and speak three languages. I contributed to military training. I have gone to school on no sleep.

"It is," Yuugi agreed. "I love him, but he really doesn't understand modern games at all. If I made a game, it'd probably be something that blended the old and the new. You know, like a board game that you could play like a hologram or something like that."

Shit, he hadn't meant to bring that up. That quiet dream, the one that he kept deep in his chest but never did anything with but smile at when things got bad.

"Though...I'm pretty sure that's not gonna happen anytime soon. Someday, though."

Those statements, though...Yuugi squinted for a moment...before answering.

"The second one."

You know, you should probably should explain your reasoning for that one...

"Well, you said that you did something to me, and you come off as a model student who would study all night and not get much rest. But you're the same age as me, right? I don't know how you would have been able to contribute to military training unless you were some kind of super spy or super genius or something...You know, like something out of a movie."

Incorrect. It was the first one. I can read and speak at least five languages. Not three.

Kaiba smirks wryly. Perhaps it wasn't the most straightforward way to do things, but it had tripped Yuugi up, hadn't it? And of course, he'll explain. He does so slowly, to convey his lip movements as clearly as possible.

Included in my list of specialties is proficiency in the field of virtual reality and holograms. The former was of particular use to...a certain company which elected to use it for military purposes--to train soldiers through virtual reality simulations.

As for being a model student, I suppose you could say that.

Model student, but not at school. There was no need for him to pay half as much attention in class as he did, not when he was already schooled to the university level before he ever showed up at Domino High.

Rather than linger on his unorthodox education or his stolen intellectual property, he'd rather fall back to thinking about the intriguing mention of a board game that could be played as a hologram. He makes a note to ask Yuugi about it later, when they're not playing a game of a different sort already.

For a moment, Yuugi mouthed the words to himself: Five languages.

Five. Languages.

But then Kaiba kept talking. He can make virtual reality things. And holograms. He's skilled in tech. Like coding and working with engines and all those things that looked so intimidating to Yuugi. And he just. Did it!

No hesitation!

"That's amazing! You're so smart, Kaiba!"

His...

(Friend)

...Roomie was so cool.

Edited 2025-04-03 23:17 (UTC)

"Okay, okay. So it's my turn now, right? Uhm..."

Come on, he had to trip him up again! He had such an interesting set of truths, but Yuugi was...Yuugi. He wasn't very interesting at all.

All he really had were games. Compared to a literal supergenius?

And...

"I taught myself English and can speak it fluently. I'm banned from the Sendai Mahjong parlor downtown. I prefer taking small bites when I eat burgers."

Of course I'm smart. I didn't get where I am being stupid.

Obvious statement, but if Kaiba had been a fool, he'd never have gotten adopted, and he'd probably have lost his brother for good. After all, adopting a five year old with a sweet expression is much more tempting than adopting a ten year old with blue eyes sharp as a hawk's, right?

He wouldn't have adopted himself.

As for the game...that was a bit more of a challenge. The question here was more along the lines of whether Yuugi actually had the brains to teach himself English all on his own. It was an exceedingly complicated language for being one with such a simplified singular alphabet.

The question of whether Yuugi would actually eat a burger slowly is also a conundrum, but that's more because Kaiba didn't really take an active role in trying to research Yuugi's eating habits. It's not like they were friends.

Hmm.

The first one's the lie. You can't expect me to believe you taught yourself a whole language alone, can you?

...Can he?

Edited (wording) 2025-04-04 01:03 (UTC)

"I don't know, what do you think, Mr. Kaiba?" Yuugi responded in perfectly accented English. "Being able to play American video games and watch American shows is way past cool, you know!"

See, Yuugi was hip. He watched the coolest shows right out of America. By talking to a guy from the nearby American military base who recorded them on VHS and gave them to him, but you know. It was fun! It was a really good way to learn his English and get his hands on the American RP books and video games that people liked to pass around! Yeah, you had to go to specific shops to even know where to look, but that was part of the game! The thrill! The adventure of diving into that kind of subculture--

Oh, right. Aha. Probably should do more than just grin, yeah?

"I even got my hands on a copy of Mortal Kombat for the Mega Drive, and that was really hard to get!"

Holy shit he really did teach himself English. Kaiba is actually impressed! Enough that it shows on his face, whether he wants it to or not.

Hmm. So you learned English, just so you could do things like watch television and play games?

It looks judgmental. If it had sound, it'd sound judgmental. But not for the reason Yuugi would assume. While Kaiba would never be able to identify it, much less admit it, there was the barest shade of...envy. There wasn't a world in which Seto Kaiba would ever be able to do something as impressive as learn the English language through osmosis.

He was book smart, and not in a good way.

He almost wants to tell Yuugi his accent's muddled...but that would be disrespectful to the effort.

And it's actually not a bad accent at all.

I didn't ask for your whole life story, is what he settles on mouthing, before returning to the game.

Anyway.

I detest oden. My parents are rich and well-connected. I've fallen asleep in class at least once.

There. That ought to give Yuugi plenty to work with. As before, one of the answers is...tricky. Kaiba doesn't feel bad about it either. Though...he is starting to feel mildly lightheaded. Not enough to show. Enough to notice.

He's also probably tired. So it's likely related to that.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/2

2/2

no subject

no subject

no subject