Seto Kaiba (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
firstrateduelist) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
kittensinboxes2025-03-03 11:39 am
firstrateduelist) wrote in kittensinboxes2025-03-03 11:39 am
Hang My Head, Drown My Fear [Lab of Nature AU, Suffering Is Magic]
Kaiba remembers pain. He remembers...drowning.
And he remembers smiling as he maliciously made it all worse and watched the life spill from his throat, spewing out with arterial force before him and creating a mess of wasted life all around him.
Then, he remembers--more pain? How could there be more pain after death? He knows he's screaming, but nothing comes out. He struggles against his bonds, but he's too weak, too weak, and even opening his eyes shows little besides the searing white lights of an operating room, the flash of a face that resembles an ape...and then, nothing. He feels something cover his mouth, inhales reflexively...then passes out. It's a release, freeing him from the delirium of the restoration and the pain of the experimentation that occurs in between.
He won't remember it. Perhaps that's a mercy.
---
When Kaiba finally does wake, it's in a new room, with aching limbs, a soured stomach, and a throat that feels poorly patched up.
He's too weak to sit up, but his tired eyes scan his surroundings, seeking out any familiarity at all. He has to do it slowly, so that the tracking of his own eyes doesn't nauseate him more than he already is.
And he remembers smiling as he maliciously made it all worse and watched the life spill from his throat, spewing out with arterial force before him and creating a mess of wasted life all around him.
Then, he remembers--more pain? How could there be more pain after death? He knows he's screaming, but nothing comes out. He struggles against his bonds, but he's too weak, too weak, and even opening his eyes shows little besides the searing white lights of an operating room, the flash of a face that resembles an ape...and then, nothing. He feels something cover his mouth, inhales reflexively...then passes out. It's a release, freeing him from the delirium of the restoration and the pain of the experimentation that occurs in between.
He won't remember it. Perhaps that's a mercy.
---
When Kaiba finally does wake, it's in a new room, with aching limbs, a soured stomach, and a throat that feels poorly patched up.
He's too weak to sit up, but his tired eyes scan his surroundings, seeking out any familiarity at all. He has to do it slowly, so that the tracking of his own eyes doesn't nauseate him more than he already is.
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Now.
"Whoever you are..." Yuugi turned towards where Kaiba swung, hoping he was on target. Were they right there? Were they? Was he enabling his hallucinations, or would this help?
He didn't know.
He didn't know, he didn't know! All he knew was that his friend was in trouble, and he needed to Help!
"Leave Kaiba alone! Leave both of us alone!"
cw; seizure
This time, it's not a whistle of air near his ears to make him flinch, no. This time, Kaiba collapses back on the bed as if pulled down, then starts to squirm and gasp, as if...as if he's being throttled where he lay.
At least, that's what it looks like at first. And it is what he feels is happening, as if he has strong, thick fingers clenched around his deplorably scrawny neck, squeezing the air out of him.
In reality...the way he twitches on the bed, his muscles tensing involuntarily? That's less about the hallucination, and more about the poison, which has him convulsing.
So again.
He probably shouldn't have eaten the poison cupcake.
Thankfully for Yuugi, this part shouldn't last long. But the real question was what he could really do about it? Is he going to approach his ashen-faced future classmate and try to do anything at all, or simply watch the seizure transpire?
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It was with one of his classmates with epilepsy when he was in Elementary school; they'd had a seizure right in the middle of the classroom, convulsing like someone put a lightning rod to his spine.
He hadn't been able to do much back then, but the teacher did do something in particular as the poor kid wriggled and spasmed in the middle of the carpet--
Yuugi knelt by Kaiba's side and put his hand behind his head so he wouldn't hurt himself.
And...
"I said: stop it! Don't hurt him!"
He was seeing something he couldn't. If he acted like he was against whatever Kaiba was seeing, maybe he would see him as a friend. Maybe he wouldn't try to hurt himself or Yuugi in the process...!
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In truth, it's no more than a couple of minutes, in which the teen's body spasms on the bed, involuntarily arching up, then down, his arms moving in erratic, but weak arcs.
It's no more than a couple of minutes where those blue eyes were vacant, skewed to one side and seeing nothing.
It passes over time, and Kaiba's body...well, it doesn't fully relax immediately, but the erratic movements simmer down, and he lets out a pained groan as his wits return to him. No more darkness...no more voices for now.
Only pain and exhaustion. And warmth.
Warmth...?
Yuu...
It's all he manages to mouth. What happened to him? He has no memory since....since he'd been pinned to the bed by that monster.
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Kaiba's body was a heavy weight against him, even as Yuugi adjusted to compensate for his jerking, his spasming, his--
His reaction to the damn poison.
By the time he had settled down, his head was in a warm lap, fingers carding through stringy hair as gentle eyes gazed down at him.
"Right here," he soothed, "How do you feel?"
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He answers plainly:
Bad.
His body burns. The muscles, and even his skin feel like they're on fire. And yet...where he might normally push Yuugi away, he finds that aside from lacking the motor control and energy to do so...he lacks the urge.
The fingers in his hair feel comforting, and he's ill-equipped to rebuff it.
Cold.
He feels cold, but his skin is burning up. Quite the conundrum.
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He shouldn't have eaten it. Gods, this idiot. This stupid, stupid idiot. This prideful idiot that got himself in this mess.
And yet--
Here he was, watching over him anyway.
"Though maybe...we might be able to get you to sweat it out, if we get more fabric on you..."
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You're touching me.
It seems obvious enough, but to someone who is currently prone to hallucinating due to his poor life choices, of course he'd say that. He's...confirming that those are Yuugi's hands.
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Easy.
Slow and easy...
"Yeah," he murmured. "I am. It's just me."
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Another statement of truth. Kaiba's face is mostly impassive about it, though when Yuugi brushes his bangs slightly away, he'll note that the hawkish eyes are somewhat less sharp when you can see Kaiba's eyebrows.
Anyone would assume they'd constantly be drawn in a scowl. It seemed as much just a few seconds before.
But that wasn't the case now. His expression is one of pain, and his brows were knit together as such.
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What could he even do...? Yuugi's fingers tangled with the other's hair, trying to soothe, bring comfort, anything! Anything to ease that expression of pain from his face.
I'm sorry, He thought, If only I'd just eaten the stupid thing before his dumb pride got in the way...
"Can I do anything...? To ease the pain...?"
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And then, through the pain, Kaiba smirks coldly.
They want their Light.
After saying it, he winces and squirms in the bed...but it's out of stomach pain, and not another seizure. Without really thinking about it, he turns his head into Yuugi's touch. His mind is swirling, there's still whispers at his ear that he's trying to ignore and...even though he said no, Yuugi's touch is comforting.
It's grounding. Real. He wants it.
Still wouldn't eat parts of you, he adds stubbornly.
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He speaks softly:
"Well, I guess that means I don't have to worry about getting eaten again, then. Hehe, having someone's teeth sunk into you kinda sucks."
Gods, "light". To hell with the scientists' Light! They could rot in darkness for all he cared, if it meant that none of the people here would have to suffer anymore.
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They won't.
Kaiba's lips move slowly on the last of those words. The hallucinations were one thing, but the seizure had drained him immensely. Pain or no pain...he was starting to drift.
But if he did...there was at least one thing he wanted. Weakly, he reaches for one of Yuugi's arms, fingers closing tightly on his wrist. Not enough to hurt. Just enough to convey intent.
Stay. Don't leave. He needs to know Yuugi's there.
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He could, but would he? That was the interesting question: he wasn't used to having to think of himself beyond the basics. He was used to being the shield, the barrier to protect those he loved.
To value himself...
Something in his stomach felt warm, distant and hazy.
With his other hand, he took Kaiba's other hand and squeezed it, just gentle enough to be an attempt at comforting.
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How...was Yuugi so warm? It felt good, because he felt so cold. Even if that was his body lying to him, and the fever had him burning up, he didn't care. More...he wanted more of it.
Kaiba's eyes roll shut slowly, his breathing somewhat labored as he lays there, reveling in the warmth of Yuugi Mutou as sweat beads along his forehead.
G...good. You can't...lose. You're my rival, and my rival has to be...
Kaiba winces again.
...has to be strong. Undefeated. For me.
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Nobody'd called Yuugi their Rival before. Of course he'd won games plenty of times and even earned the ire of some regulars in the game halls he'd been to, but...
...Rival?
Something in his chest shifted.
Something...something. Something he couldn't name, but was tangible just the same.
"I will."
When was the last time he'd spoken with such determination? When he met that...other person that looked a lot like Kaiba, right? During the gun experiment?
"I'll make you proud to call me your rival."
Gentle fingers carded through sweaty hair, soothing against dampening skin. Gods, the man looked so sick...
If only he could do more...
a little skip. as a treat.
Lightheadedness finally overwhelms him, and the fever sweeps his consciousness away. He won't be the most still as he sleeps though; he tosses and turns, and he'd probably groan audibly if his vocal cords worked, but they don't. So it's hisses and heavy breathing.
Yuugi's suggestion that he sweat off the fever turns out to be what happens. For a few hours, he's squirmy and shivering...until the fever finally breaks and he can relax.
Somewhat.
He's still hearing things in his sleep. Feeling things on his skin...but in the rare instance he comes around briefly, as long as it's Yuugi's hands on him, he's able to slip back into oblivion with minimal anxiety.
It's hours later still, when he wakes up for good, his hair absolutely out of sorts, his body aching, and his insides feeling distinctly uncomfortable even now.
"Wh..."
...ere?
Oh. Ohh, that's almost a word, in almost a voice, but it's more wheeze than volume.
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Gods, he'd never thought he'd have a man in his lap for this long, petting his hair and shushing him as he woke up, feverish and shivering (before he went back to sleep). He'd never thought he'd have the man wake up with Yuugi's hands using...something to brush the sweat off his brow.
That something being Yuugi's own shirt.
Why yes, he was shirtless right now.
"You're in the cell; nobody moved you," Yuugi said, "I think your fever's finally broken."
Though Kaiba sweated so much that Yuugi's shirt was soaked through with it, and it was tossed aside in the corner of the room--
--When did two fresh sets of clothes get brought in through the bars? There wasn't anything else, but at the very least there were clothes. Did someone come in, or did they use some kind of machine or chute?
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More to the point...
Why aren't you wearing a shirt?
Somehow, his facial expression makes that seem accusatory.
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It didn't, obviously.
What was he supposed to do? Let Kaiba drown in his own pouring sweat and spit as he laid delirious in his lap with fever? No way! Making sure he was at least dry was probably the bare minimum, but...!
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Quintessential Kaiba Reaction.
At the very least, that encourages Kaiba to try and scoot further away from Yuugi. Not that he didn't assume he should be thanking Yuugi for taking care of him while he was ill, but...
Well, he's Seto Kaiba. He's not going to say thank you, especially not to his shirtless rival.
I'm sure I'll have the opportunity to repay the favor.
See? That's not really thank you.
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He paused.
"That's a lot, you know. Means a lot."
Given their circumstances, though, he knew that he was going to repay the favor eventually to his satisfaction; it was just the nature of their proximity, of the experiments, of...
Of everything.
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That much is true. He couldn't have borne the loss without an incalculable shame that would have made it impossible to face Yuugi. Though...the words may as well have been taken out of his own skin, for how they ached.
He reaches a hand up to his throat, to where the skin was still marred from where he'd been punished for his transgressions by Helios during that game. It doesn't ache so much as his abdomen anymore, distended with the poison that had settled inside but not been digested. Still, he'd rather draw attention to those bruises than the fact that he was still having trouble with the damnable cake.
Quiet whispers tickled at Kaiba's ears, but he did not heed them. The words were unintelligible anyway. The sounds were merely auditory hallucinations of a sort that he could ignore
(mostly)
as he glances around, catches sight of the clothing that had been left for them.
There. A shirt. Go on then, why don't you change? I will not look.
He isn't in the mood to speculate, actually, how the clothing got there. The fever is broken, but that's only step one, isn't it?
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Amused.
"Kaiba, we're both guys! There's no reason to be weird about me not having a shirt! I don't care if you look!"
It wasn't like Kaiba was this muscular god of a man who was miles above Yuugi; they were both scrawny young men in that awkward phase of their lives, not quite comfortable with their bodies yet (Though too bad for Yuugi, he didn't have much left to grow into)...
Still, he hopped off the bed, grabbing a shirt and pulling it over his head.
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CW: Mention of bodily functions (Toilet use)
cw; emeto, malnutrition
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